i'm sorry...

when we drove past you, i critically said (out loud) that you had corny biking gear and an expensive bike and i criticized you for not really "riding" the way i would if i had the same gear. in this moment, i was expressing all that is ugly in me. for this, i am sorry. you didn't know i said what i did. and i have no clue what the rest of your life consists of. what i do know is that i was acting out of my own insecurities. being so incredibly judgemental was young and small and ugly. i am trying so hard to be more present, to not judge, and to certainly not criticize to make myself feel better. being mean was my false medication. and i used you on that particular day. i was put in my place. karma is a bitch. and i commit to doing my best to work that ugly side of me into something constructive. i am sorry...